These pictures are about a month old but I felt this blog had to much of my blah, blah, blah going on so having a picture of my cute boys should liven it up.
Here, Aidan was enjoying his first four layer dessert and he enjoyed it, let me tell you! He couldn't eat it fast enough and kept smiling and making smacking sounds the whole time. It was hilarious.
In the above picture, he is wearing Camden's Lightning McQueen vest. He thought he was pretty funny wearing his brother's clothes...or as Aidan says it, "Fubby!"
Here is our all-star Camden! He will play baseball and soccer and basketball and hockey and golf and any other sport possible. I proudly took this action shot. This baseball thingy is awesome! I don't have to pitch to him anymore and have him tell me that I'm doing it wrong. haha
Here he is all ready for church with one of Nate's old mission ties on. Isn't he handsome?!
We try to make sure that our kids' hdads are protected at ALL times. hehe. Aidan wears his helmet when he rides on the back of Nathan's bike but this day, he had to wear it the whole time he was playing.I love my boys. They make me laugh every day. As Aidan gets older I start having a nagging voice in the back of my head, wondering if I'm going to have any more children. I won't lie or deceive, having two kids, for me, is hard! I'm just outnumbered during the day and because of Aidan's ear infections he's been kind of a grumpy kid, though not so much lately. I just don't know if I can do it all over again. Triple the guilt, triple the no sleep, triple the financial obligations, and again, triple the guilt of not being everything to every kid. Why would I do that to myself? My husband is all ready to pull in the reins and be done...but I feel guilty. I guess I'm damned it I do and damned if I don't. I have a long list of negatives and really can't fathom adding to the family but somehow I don't feel content with that.
What if there's one more spirit needing our family and we can't do it because we're being selfish? We're at a kind of stressful point in our lives because we're still students and living on loans but it won't be this way forever, right? I just always had it in my head that three was a great number and one that I could handle. Now that I have to face the fact that I might not be able to handle it...I guess I kind of feel like a failure.
Any thoughts? I know that I won't be making a life changing decision right now, especially since we'll be moving soon. But the dilemma is always there. What do you think?
4 comments:
Holy moly Lem! I could have written the part about having a 3rd baby! That is exactly how we feel! My theory is that this time around I am going to wait a little longer. I'll start thinking about number 3 when Brandon is at least 2 1/2. I'm at my limit these days too! I just can't get my head around only having 2 kids (even if they make me crazy).
I'm sure you will make the right decision! Hugs!
First, your boys are cute.
Second, beat's the heck out of me. I feel like I'll feel forever guilty if I don't get to five since that's how many my mom had. At the same time, I think with every kid I'll become a worse, more impatient mom.
At this point, I'm just going to pretend I have to get to 10 and then maybe three wont seem so overwhelming.
Good luck!
Well I say 2 is a glorious number! Why mess with perfection (when imperfection is so much more fun?!)
I'm a big fan of doing what you need to do because YOU have to take care of the kids. Some people feel "guilty" based on religion or whatever else...BUT, ultimately, YOU are rasing your children and YOU have to be sane, and YOU have to do what is within your means both financially and otherwise. I'm quite sure the Pearly Gates have never been slammed shut because a family chose to have two kids instead of three, or five, or eight. And there you have it...my opinion anyway.
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